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Sometimes I cry so hard from pleading
So sick and tired of all the needless beating
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Jean, 29091988I felt that night, on the stage, incredibly close to everything in the universe, but also extremely alone. I wondered, for the first time in my life, if life was worth all the work it took to live. — Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close
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Thursday, September 25, 2008
pretty fast. and we are here to thursday. last sat was a small gathering at pat's chalet with DSB and the rest. Had some chivas cum beer and headed home after a few hours. HEY patty pat! I hate you for what you had said that day at the chalet (if you even remember) lol. but I forgive you since it was your birthday. laughs Happy Belated Birthday to you again! hope you had fun! Stop growing more hairs and being so horny. lol! (: My apologies to Enid for not turning up for your bbq on sunday, but I think you had fun didnt you! Stay pretty and happy with your bf! *hugs* Happy Belated Birthday to Enid too! sunday. b'fren took me to the chinese doctor to cure my breathing difficulties and bad cough that had been clingling on me for days. and the medication for 7 days cost me $64.30. I swear that this has been the most expensive doctor that ive ever been to. Health has been in pretty bad shape for a period of time. ohwell, some money cant be saved. b'fren drove down to Marina Square and we caught a movie. The Days.  Pretty nice and realistic show. You should go catch it. (: drove along the circuit for F1, and indeed the track's very narrow. we managed to catch a glance at the pit stop too. its too beautiful!monday. my sickness got worst and I almost couldnt climb out of bed. was feeling so terrible. b'fren has been very sweet and nice, he came down to fetch me for breakfast and brought me to the clinic. We went to the Polyclinic and to my horror, i have to wait for 39 people just for registration itself. omfg. my head was bursting and b'fren had no choice but to bring me to the private clinic nearby my house. $30! thus. In 2 days, Ive spent near to $100 to get medication and consultation. so well done! and till this very moment, which is a Thursday morning, I hadnt fully recover yet. so tell me, does the problem lies with the doctor? or my body? tuesday. I hadnt recover fully, I took medication and I was struggling the whole day at work in order to focus hard. terrible. wednesday. b'fren was lovely to suprise me by picking me up from work. (: work load's getting pretty heavy. I hope I can still take it. begin to dislike all the lill eyes here and there. and I dun understand why these people loves to be such a nosey freak, poking their long dirty noses into every single thing of what Im doing. freaks! Long coming weekends for me, Ive taken leave on Monday too. Tuesday's back to work and Wednesday's Hari Raya, Thursday have to be back for meeting. Friday and then weekends again. thus next week wld be short and fast. great! as for this weekend, I think Ill rest at home, watch F1 on Channel 5 and maybe grab some potato chips. roar. roads blocked, trains gonna be packed, taxis' gonna burn your pockets, bf's still sick due to wrong medication till now and needs to golf competition. so, it would be a nice cosy long weekend for me at home. (: till then! say Hello to my new LG Viewty KU990! (: (: Saturday, September 20, 2008
Ive changed by next sat's duty to today, thus this beautiful sat morning, Im stoning here in the office. thankyouuuu... its not a bad thing working on such a bright sat morning, but i just thought of something that totally just cuts it all on the birthday mood. Next weekends, are the F1 racing days. screwed up. Town's gonna be packed, roads are blocked. So how on earth am I going to go downtown to meet vin and the rest for dinner? farkedup. Im so unhappy and upset. why the hell does F1 needs to fall on such days, especially when now weekends mean so much to me. Im not happy.... Thursday, September 18, 2008
PARDON me. Ive dropped the idea of going interview this sat. laughs! b'fren's right. How could I be air stewardess when I'm always so lost without seeing him? hahaa... true though.. I know this would be a good chance, (since Im still young, thats what everyone is saying) and I should give it a try. It felt weird. imagine I have to be so polite. No having nicotine breaks. Thick makeup. Materialistic and realistic girls. think back. its really not me. and besides, working long as a stewardess seems soooooo deadly. No career prospects. Imagine you spend 5 years working as a stewardness, then you get married and pregnant. You'll be sacked. and there goes your rice bowl. and when you are getting a new job after you had given birth. you've come to realise that you had just became a flower vase, with no other working experience. with the fast ongoing speed of the society, organizations may have changed so much that when you've realised it. TOO LATE! **P.S I have nothing against air stewardesses. really. just that I know that Im not emotionally prepared to be one, though feedback was, I would sure be taken in. rofl. Its just based on personal views and opinions. =D** enough of this topic! lets take a look at one of the birthday gifts that I've bought for b'fren for his 24th birddae on July. (:    His PUMA Golf Bag.
b'fren has such an expensive hobby. laughs. I'm not complaining. I just love lazing around the driving range, chill and watch him practise. its makes me feel happy & proud, to have such a talented&loving sweetie. (: 9 more days to out 8th month anniversary, 11 days to my birthday. there's nothing much to complain about Life now at least. (:
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
random random random random random. this is a random post. Im so tired from work. I wanna be full time johngoh's wife for a short period now. can i? laughs. spouting nonsense. please ignore. but anyway.. VIN! Congrats in passing your TP just with the first time!!! *claps claps claps!!* feeling happy for you! but please dont be like Camen ok! laughs.. hahhaa.. I'll see DSB real soon next week! weet! (: there is this mass interview for air stewardess this sat for JetStar. omg. should i go and see see look look? alot of people asked me to go and try. laughs. but should i try try? i need comments and feedbacks people.......omg... rofl... Monday, September 15, 2008
i hate my breathing system. i hate my lungs and i hate my heart. I feeling like ripping off the rib cages and tear off the bones to let oxygen go in. I hate having breathing difficulties.. URGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! Saturday, September 13, 2008
ok. its sat morning! and hello to weekends. and soon goodbye again! whatever~ but anyway, gonna wish HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY to DSB Number 7 RAYMOND GOH! Im sorry that I could'nt turn up. but not really so, but it was due to the sudden change of plans. omg. I was rather disappointed. 'cause I thought like for really once, DSB and DSS could be of full attendance! laughs. oh well! hope you had fun that day ok! be like a grown up now! *pats on the shoulder...!* September's full of birthdae babies. omg. I keep receiving messages for chalets, bbq, celebrations. laughs. we shall see how it goes huh. I officially hate mooncakes for now. I swear! Everyone at work has been stuffing me with mooncakes for like the past 5days. keep asking me to eat. Im totally turn off by the sight of it. URGH! omg. its really EVERYDAE. wanna kill myself. Boss even mentioned that I can afford to eat like 10 mooncakes. wtf. the next person who's gonna ask me to eat mooncake.................................................... I'll offically ask them to stuff the mooncake up their asses!!! lol! hahaha! ok.. Im kidding. but whatever it is. NO MORE MOONCAKES FOR ME! till 2009's Mooncake Festival! =D Friday's nice. b'fren waited and picked me up from workplace carpark. His freaking sinper jungle-hat and his army uniform really got me entertained for the whole journey. went over to Upper Changi Road to get his white light fixed on his 'Little Yellow' and headed to Simpang Bedok for dinner. home, bathed, den b'fren came to fetch me out again. (: Now, he's sleeping away like a pig. but the poor boy has to wake up in 5hrs time to work and golf again. damn. i need rest. like really. im falling sick again. I dun wan!! *counting down, counting down.* Thursday, September 11, 2008
Growing up is never a simple, easy process, neither is is smooth-sailing. I was reading through my previous blog entries, starting from Friendster blogs then to blogger, backtracking the days all the way back to Year 2005. Realized, people come and go in my Life. Though so, they had left footprints in me. Footprints has pros and cons. Some left me happy moments, some drowning me in pool of tears. Guess, I've really grown up, in some ways, here and there. Different people at different stage of my life, taught me different things. Different point of views, different angles, different perspective, different solving solutions, different problems. It brought me to who I am today. Im happy that whenever I am down, there's always angels pulling my hands along. From 2005 to date 2008, it has only been 3 to 4 years. and why so? does it feels as though its been so long ago? and graduating from Riverside Secondary isnt' many years back ago too. But why does it seems so far and so out of reach? Reading back, really, thats nothing that would hold on to us forever. Friendship, love, kinship, everyday, people are born, people die. Even memories would fade and dont stay with you for long. Do you even remember how you spend your everyday like 5 years back ago? in details? I could only recalled, past few years, Life was full of ups and downs. It was really like riding a roller coaster. I hate it. Life was tiring, contridicting and so complexing for me. In fact, Life was a hinder, a burden that I had to pulled with everyday. Facing the everyday problems again and again. Making me all tired and exhausted. phew! Everything changed. Let alone Humans. Thats Life. take it accept it. or just walk to your nearest window and hop down. but its ok, I love b'fren, and he loves me too. thats asked for now. I thankyou. Thankyou for grabbing hold of me when I almost when dead at heart, pulling me hard and along with you, the heavy burdens we share together, the things we had been through together, the days we spent together. (: I could'nt asked for anything more. Thankyou for making my life simpler, better and grounded sweetie. 16 more days to 8th month anniversary. 18 days to turning 20. Im a contented lady of this ugly life. (:   come seduce me. Wednesday, September 10, 2008
good wednesday! Im blogging before sleep! =D work's nice on tues!! and a last minute meeting in the morning. laughs. Im gonna be part of the planning team of the upcoming huge event. with 1000 delegates. (: theres so much A&P stuffs to come up with. (: workworkwork. meet up with vin at aljunied mrt station after work and brought him down to Century Square Best Denki to get his present for his mum's birthdae. Portable DVD Player. help him settled his stuffs and directed him to the bus stop, I went back alone to Best Denki. Promised the rest for a short chill-out session, so I made my way back upstairs. Most of the promoters had changed, and Best Denki looked so un-happening after I left. Good grief I didnt go back and work there. shakehead, I would be stuck there for ages again. tskk. after those sessions, got downstairs for another nicotine break, bought some drinks and msged honeymonkey. knowing that I was alone, he was nice and sweet enough to come down all the way from Marina Bay to Century Square to pick me up... (: was feeling so happy and beaming all the way, besides that part whereby he almost fought with the cab driver in front. shakehead. treated like a lill young girl, he sent me home, holding my hands up the stairs, hugged and kissed me goodbye. laughs. and he headed home! thanks for the ride home b'fren! (: rotted here and there, phoned with b'fren and im off to bed!!!! goodnight angels! Monday, September 08, 2008
Lets not have any Monday blues yet, 'cause its Brunch time soon. (: Weekends are gone again and back to work. Friday Night b'fren drove his 'Little Yellow' to pick me up from home and headed to The Cathy for a walk. together with jun and chuyun with their 'Little White' too. walked over to Plaza Singapura and we decided to watch movie for the sake of watching movie and pass time. and so... we watched.. THE DARK KNIGHT! laughs.. omg... i feel so freaking outdated and lagging behind time. we were expecting to be alone in the theatres, but suprisingly, the last 2/3 rows are filled! so hahaha.. there are others similar like us too! hoho... Before the show started, we spent like 1 hr plus in the arcade. we had fun like small kids.. jumping here and there..laughs.. we had a video taken by chuyun. but ive forgotten to get it from her. ill upload it soon.. =D after movie it was like 3am+, drove out to Selegie for some Rochor beancurd, but it was closed. -.- so we all headed home for bed! (: Saturday initially promised Camen to reach at 1 to chit chat with him at Batok, but I couldnt wake up. I was too tired from the one whole week of work. =D woke up, ate a lill, bathe&changed, den slowly walk out to busstop to wait for 506. *yawns*. do all the things that has to be done and sat down with the rest. If anyone could remember, the scar on my right hand was quite bad a few years back ago. But i believe only Joe and Patrick would remember. that was done by my most beloved friend. WEIGUO if anyone could remember our long lost friend. laughs. I would remember him all my life for as long as my right hand is stil attached to my body. and now, I would remember Camen all my life too, for leaving a scar on my right hand knuckles. lol! but i hope that will get better. 'cause it stil hurts now bro!! omg.. zomg. my right hand is so ugly. Please chop it away! Sunday Was sleeping all the way with baby till 7pm. laughs! went for dinner @ 511 with weibin.telly.valerie.junxiang.chuyun.and baby. home sweet home after that! at this very moment, my stomach has been shouting non stop since 9am. 2.5 weeks more to pay day! hoho! faster come faster come! =D oh! tell you a lill secret! *b'fren might be bringing me to Andy Lau's concert during December! hohohohoho! weeeeee...... im such a happy girl!** 27th is the 8th month that we are together. 29th is my 20th birthdae. We'll have it all together and share the happiness! (: LOVES! (P.S. Im not naked nor with a towel. Im in a blue tube dress and my shoulders are blocked by baby. so, dont think too much. laughs.)  Im always beaming when I see him. I dunno know. Before we are together, till now we are together, going 8 months, you had never failed to bring a smile on my face each time i see you. I love you! and you know it too. (: hearts. Friday, September 05, 2008
Happy Friday to all! Im trying hard to revive my blog for the past few days, but it didnt work. laughs. Im sorry. But Im back. Everything seems fine at work. like SEEMS. I really hope it fine, and I hope that it would be like this for a few more years. Ultimately, yea, I would leave here, in a few years time. laughs. why the decision? this may not be what ive wanted for now. I believe that I would have to go a longer route to get to what I want. For me, there's no shortcuts, Im not financially strong enough to survive without working. No work = No Money = Eat Grass. I may consider in taking ACCA part time next year. ANYONE INTERESTED TO STUDY WITH ME? so that after work, I would just have to go into the lift and go downstairs for lesson. laughs. I would need a study companion in order to survive through. or else, Ill be vomitting blood sitting with the other students I feel. laughs.. so anyone thinking of stdying ACCA? this will take a long route. It will be tough and I will be struggling. But basically, I would just need lots of understanding from family and bf. i dunno! i hadnt make my mind yet. tskk. bfren was sick yesterday. and I mean yes, hes really in bad shape. I was at home, walked out to buy him a pack of Mild 7 and Fisherman. cabbed down to visit him for awhile and cabbed back... He really looked ----------- monsterous. laughs.. I could help but keep laughing badly.. haha.. I shall not describe further.. he would kill me if he reads this.. =D get well soon darlin'! (: 3 more weeks to me and vin's day. laughs. hello vin, this is the 3rd year we ARE going to have our bdae together. =D Lets have a DSB dinner ok! like strictly DSB only. laughs. I hadnt had a wishlist for so long. think its time to have one. =D
omg. I cant think of anything else. Theres never lack of things to buy, but Im only lack with cash to buy them all. But these are like on the top priority things that I need now. laughs. Anyone that prefers to give me a big ANGBAO w/o gifts its ok! I'll still accept! heehee... 1. Watch - I wore my watch to work not realising that its spoilt, think its time to change a new decent watch. laughs. 2. Black cardigan - I lost my Mango wool material cardigan. neh neh de. $70 over bucks. 3. Escada Perfume - Ive run out of my supply. the supply that addicts people to death. laughs. People like KIM GUAN. hahhahaa... 4. AnnaSui Mascara - I dunno, thats extra, but I just like it. =D see. Im just a simple girl to please. I dun need 897456147882174137763 things to satisfy me. *hints* =D |
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But baby, where they knock you down and out
Is where you oughta stay |
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